Me time
I’m the first to admit that when it comes to Arthur I have been a little obsessive. I guess with being here and everyone I know here working (at the school mostly) and not having family here, I kinda gave myself this 100% 24 hours a day attachment to Arthur. Little to no me time included! Now i know thats not a bad thing as such but I think it came to a point where I was losing my identity a little bit. This was all totally self inflicted, Mark would tell me to go visit friends, go diving or whatever but I didn’t feel like I should be leaving him. I had a couple of trips out here and there but we are talking less than once a month and never for more than a couple of hours. I felt really bad for Mark as he was feeling like I didn’t trust him with Arthur but that wasn’t the case at all. My thinking was that if Mark was free I wanted us all to be spending time together as a family not me going off by myself! By the time Mum and Dad got here Arthur was 9 months old and I don’t know if it was anticipation of my parents coming but all of a sudden something clicked and I felt ready to start doing some stuff without Arthur, some things where I could be Chantelle again not just Arthur’s Mum. So, what have I been doing? Well, over Easter I did lots of diving. I’ve started running again, I’ve been going pretty much every other day. just short distances but it feels good to be getting into it. I’m hoping this weekend to try a little longer distance and see how I get on. I’m starting French lessons tonight, once a week. I’m excited about this, although, I was really terrible at French at school (I’m going to blame my French teacher though, he was mean!) Other than that its just some little things, taking some time out to look after myself a little bit using some nice products on my hair, using some nice moisturisers…..really simple things that take two minutes, I would never have dreamed of not doing before having Arthur but I just stopped once I had him. Anyway! Having had some me time, I realised that it was not only good for me, but probably good for everyone! I definitely become nicer to be around when I’ve had some time doing something thats for me! It’s been great for Mark and Arthur too as they’ve got to spend some really nice time together, just the two of them! What do you do for your me time?
You are just right to take some time for yourself Chantelle! I’m awful at this too – I’m eternally the guilty mum – but know when I do get some time to myself I feel better rested and more able to cope with family life when I get back to it. I think us mum’s find it difficult to let go, but doing so benefits everyone in the long run, doesn’t it? Loved reading this poppet xx
Oh it’s lovely that you’re getting some time for you. It’s only really since Little Man was about 6 months that I’ve started to have time to myself too, like you I dedicated myself to the children and doing things for them. I’m loving the me time though! x
Donna recently posted…Planning for Baby’s First Holiday
Oh I was the same as you when we were abroad … whenever my husband was home, I wanted to spend time as a family rather than leave him with the little one. Three years on and a second child later, I’m still not very good at ‘me time’ … I really miss the kids. I’ve realised that just an hour or two here and there is enough for me to recharge my batteries and think things through without being CONSTANTLY asked questions. I tend to just pop to the local hotel and have a latte and a piece of cake. I love going there by myself with just a magazine for company.
Rachel – 3yearsandhome recently posted…The ultimate steak sandwich
This is brilliant, we all need some time to be us too. Even if it’s just a little bit, it keeps me sane too. It also makes me appreciate my time with them more on the difficult days.
All of your me time activities sound totally fantastic, can’t wait to hear how you get on with your lessons and running x
Sarah (@tamingtwins) recently posted…Oven Baked Brunch Rosti with Smoked Salmon
Finding time for yourself is so important but can be tricky to manage sometimes. I do think it makes you a better parent too simply because it makes you happier as a person. I’m glad you’ve found some ways to enjoy yourself. #sharewithme
Iona@redpeffer recently posted…Easy masking tape craft
Well don you, I’ve also started doing this recently, I’ve joined the gym and am making an effort to do a bit of gardening every day. Your right you do feel so much better after having a bit of me time, I also think i interact with Jake better throughout the day if we are not together 24/7
The lifeofwife recently posted…Reducing our food shopping bill
It’s so important to have ‘me time’ even if it is hard to juggle everything around. Even just a few minutes it’s better than nothing. It sounds like you’ve had a lovely time hun xxx
Michelle recently posted…Children’s Crafts – Button Photo Frame
Lovely post, and I can empathise with that feeling of losing a bit of yourself and having to reclaim it. I still struggle with it. I’d still say my favourite me time is family time!
Zena’s Suitcase recently posted…Is Morrisons Cheaper? by a #MorrisonsMum
Absolutely right, Chantelle, me time is not just good for mummy but for the whole family. I totally know what you mean about feeling guilty to be away from them, but you are doing everyone a favour. And it’s nice to give your husband a bit of freedom to form his own relationship with Arthur that is separate to the family dynamic. It’s gone a bit far in our house though – they were all playing Mario 64 at the weekend and I felt a bit left out!! x
Jess Paterson recently posted…Parenting: Then and Now
Oh C, i know only too well where you’re coming from. But it sounds like you waited until you felt ready & comfortable to leave A & do these things: thats totally fine. Everybody is different, & i struggled (& still do) leaving bear, despite so many people ‘telling’ me i should do more ‘me’ things. The only thing that truly matters is your happiness, & it sounds like you’ve got the balance spot on chick pea! 🙂 xx
Katrina recently posted…BiBs 2014 Shortlist…..THANK YOU!!
Lovely that you’re now getting a little time to be yourself again. You can get lost in mum identity. Says she, who is rarely without her kids! When they’re in bed, blog aside, I love to read – it’s easy to do and is always my favourite form of escape. if I leave them, I enjoy going to get my hair done, go for meals with friends, or browse bookshops in peace!
The Reading Residence recently posted…Viking Review
So so glad you got so me time! I did the same with Buba and didn’t leave him hardly at all for the first year but it was only after having Missy Moo I have started to do more things for just me. You are so right it is better for you, for Arthur and your hubby to have special alone time with Arthur. All around. So never feel guilty and I am glad you are starting to do it now. But now than never right? Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me. #sharewithme
Jenny recently posted…Share With Me ~ wk 14
I think me-time is so important, but can be so tricky! With three kids now, I have got much better, I think my head would explode if I didn’t get the odd break 🙂 Glad you’ve managed to make some time x #ShareWithMe
Sara (@mumturnedmom) recently posted…Me and: Makeup
Thanks Sara!!! It’s amazing how even the smallest amount of ‘me time’ can make all the difference!! Can’t imagine how much more of an effect it must have having three kids haha! X
I was exactly the same for the first year of O’s life, although I did go to a fitness bootcamp a few times a week for an hour at a time (needed to lose the huge pregnancy weight gain) and it was wonderful having that hour worrying about nobody other than myself.
I find that it’s the break from having to be constantly on the lookout rather than needing to be on my own that’s the relaxing bit!
Not A Frumpy Mum recently posted…Wakey Wakey, Rise and Shine!
I know what you mean!!!! Gives you just a little time to recharge before you jump back into the madness again 🙂 x
You should absolutely take advantage of all the opportunities you have available to have some time for yourself. Though I know it is hard. My second is so much clingier than ny first which makes it harder. Good luck with the French… emm m..au revior…
mel @mydaysni recently posted…Herb Garden in a Flower Pot
its hard for me to imagine if i’d do the same or not as baby is not here yet, i guess these are the things you give up for baby, you give up yourself,its nice though that your hubby can stay with Arthur and you can have some space
Victoria Mylittlel recently posted…Pregnancy update 33 weeks
Great post! It’s so easy to devote all your time to your baby but me time is so important. I think I would have gone crazy already without it! I’ve managed to have 2 baths since my baby was born 3 weeks ago and they were bliss! My husband let me have time to give myself a manicure and pedicure the other night – it’s the little things now! #binkylinky xx
Sarah Knott recently posted…My Labour and Birth Story
It is great to have a bit of me time, you feel like you again and not only a mummy! X
Lucinda Turner recently posted…ALWAYS CHECK THE LABEL!!!
I never have me time! I’m attached to our girls so much. When I go out to work or the shop without them, I feel like I have to rush back home to be with them! I’d like some me time though! Even if all I did was worry about my girls! Thanks for linking up to the #binkylinky
Emily recently posted…Binky Linky
always good for the soul to have some lovely me time sometimes I think when you are a mum you get lost somewhere along the way! I always find a bit of time to myself means im happy and refreshed which leads to happy children! #binkylinky